When Body Image Becomes Self-Image

If I asked a simple question – “Who pays more attention to how they look; guys or girls?” – My guess is that the overwhelming majority would share the same answer. There is extensive research and literature on the subject of women and weight, body image, eating, appearance, etc. Ask the average guy how long he takes in the bathroom before going to an event and the average woman. Odds are you’ll get vastly different answers.

Now looking good is no sin – at the end of the day that’s not the problem. The problem arises when you start wrapping your self-worth up in what you can offer other people. This is the deeper problem that transcends gender or “product”. It’s difficult for me to make mistakes because on a deeper level I’m afraid that if I can’t offer something to those around me that they’ll be more likely to reject me. Indulge that type of thinking long enough and you’ll start to believe that everything that’s on the inside has no worth at all.

Consider a recent article from CBS News about an Abercrombie push-up bikini top. Not necessarily news worthy? Well it is when it’s marketed to 8-year-olds! The product has since been rebranded for older girls, but check out what the article has to say about the girls’ inner worlds:

Can wearing a sexy bra really have a corrosive effect on little girls? Absolutely, says Dr. Zurbriggen – and the scientific evidence seems to back her up. In 2007, research conducted by the task force linked sexualization of girls to eating disorders, low-self-esteem, and depression.

Eating disorders and depression can be the end result of such self-objectification. It’s easy to say “that won’t happen to me,” but in the meantime someone who judges their own worth by what they can offer others is drastically impairing their full potential.

One research study showed a direct link between how much girls (aged 10-17) objectify their own bodies and how well they can throw a softball. The girls who viewed their bodies as objects actually did a worse job throwing the softball. Another study asked college-aged girls to take a math test in a changing room. One group was asked to wear a swimsuit while taking the test and another group was asked to wear a sweater. The girls in the swimsuits performed significantly worse on the same test. If you self-objectify then you risk not being the person you could be.

On the contrary, if we truly value our true selves we will be happier and healthier. Read what the apostle Peter has to say: “Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious” (1 Peter 3:3-4). In the Old Testament God tells Samuel that “man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

If we focus on the external – “what we have to offer others” – it’s too easy to neglect the internal. And the internal is the motor that keeps our lives running. How’s your motor running? Where do you consider your worth to come from? What’s on the inside or what’s on the outside?